Daddy Everyday Blog

Educating, Encouraging and Engaging Fathers and Those Raising Our Children

Month: January, 2015

7 Important Things To Consider In Parenting

7 Important Things To Consider In Parenting

Here is a quick list of seven things to be aware of as a parent.

  1. For soon to be parents, you can’t determine your complete parenting style before your child is born. Now, you can think or imagine the values you want to in still in your child and the methods you will like to use. However, that child’s personality and needs, your patience and everyday life will truly determine your parenting style.
  1. Don’t force your child to hug or kiss someone you know but they don’t know. If your child is meeting someone like an uncle, grandparent or your best friend for the first time, don’t make him or her show affection to others the same as they would someone they already love. That person is a stranger to them until they get to know that person. Remember “stranger danger”. Don’t put your child in an uncomfortable position, just to spare the feelings of another adult.
  1. Hold your child accountable for their actions at all ages. For really young children, we have a tendency to comfort and let our children off the hook when they do something wrong and start crying. If your reaches on the table to get a cup and drops it. Assist them in the clean up and talk to the about asking for help or the danger of doing things you are not suppose to do. Normally, this would be the time we would tell them it’s okay and take care of the mess for them and the child learns nothing.
  1. Be strong parents and let your children play. As parents we can be overprotective, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. However, how will your child learn to deal with making mistakes, getting hurt and the fine art of exploring new things? Children need to sometimes learn how to deal with things on their own.
  1. Don’t ask your child a yes or no question, if the only acceptable answer is yes. If you have a statement or command to tell your child, make sure it ends in a period, and not a question mark.
  1. This is very important one. Follow through with your promises. Make sure whatever you tell your child, is what you are going to do or what is going to happen. This is how you establish your accountability and trust with your child. It is also how you can in still these qualities into your child.
  1. Be consistent. Don’t allow your child to do something at home and when they do it in public, you punish them. If there are things that you allow them to do in certain situations, explain that to them so that both of you are on the same page.

75 Weekend Family Activities

75 Weekend or Vacation Family Activities

Make this a checklist and spend some quality time with your family.

  1. Start a family garden
  2. Family movie night
  3. Have a family dinner out
  4. Cook a meal together
  5. Family bike rides
  6. Dance competition
  7. Collect and paint rocks
  8. Create a first aid kit
  9. Create a family mission statement
  10. Complete a science project
  11. Read a book together
  12. Family game night
  13. Neighborhood walks
  14. Feed the homeless
  15. Go bowling
  16. Create a scrapbook
  17. Have a garage sale
  18. Attend church together
  19. Have a home photo shoot
  20. Have a bubble blowing contest
  21. Play hide-and-seek
  22. Create a time capsule and bury it in the backyard
  23. Have a water balloon fight
  24. Have your own American Idol competition
  25. Watch a marathon of your favorite show
  26. Go to a museum
  27. Have a push-up or jump rope contest
  28. Clip pictures of a family dream home
  29. Perform magic tricks
  30. Have a karaoke night
  31. Go fishing (real worms optional)
  32. Flag Football in the yard
  33. Yard work
  34. Clean the house like it’s a game
  35. Watch a movie at home
  36. Take a karate class
  37. Play Uno or your favorite card game
  38. Hang pictures in the house
  39. Create a family cookbook
  40. Paint a bedroom
  41. Go window-shopping
  42. Go on a nature hike
  43. Write a family song or rap
  44. Create a family calendar
  45. Have a Soul Train line
  46. Visit the library
  47. Play flag football
  48. Play Videos
  49. Take a dance class
  50. Play Miniature golf
  51. List all of the local “kids eat free” locations
  52. Label all the things with a new language to learn
  53. Go visit open houses
  54. Create a family recipe book
  55. Throw family house party with the kids as the DJ
  56. Bake cookies
  57. Have a family barbecue
  58. Create emergency plans (fire escape)
  59. Have a formal dinner at home
  60. Make a grocery list and shop
  61. Have a scavenger hunt
  62. Work on a puzzle
  63. Watch a movie and critique it
  64. Go to a professional sports game
  65. Skype call to out of town family
  66. Develop a family tree
  67. Create a family play
  68. Learn a home repair
  69. Start a collection
  70. Collect items and take them to Goodwill
  71. Family slumber party
  72. Create your own board game
  73. Go on a family picnic
  74. Volunteer in the community
  75. Wash the cars

Now, That B%tch Wants To Put Me On Child Support.

Now, That B%tch Wants To Put Me On Child Support.

Let me start this post with, she wasn’t a b!tch when you laid down with her. Or if she was, you should have worn protection. Now, that we have established she is not a b!tch for putting you on child support, let’s get started.

The purpose of child support is to provide financial assistance for the child. This child support money should be paid by the non-custodial parent. Know that even in joint custody cases with two custodial parents, one may still need to pay child support. Arrangements for financial support for your child should be in written and overseen by a third party. Even if the relationship between you and the mother is good. Times change and so do people. Get it in writing or go to the courts for a decision.

So, what happens if you are hit with paying back child support? You should have handled this from the beginning, but hindsight is 20/20. Below are is a list of penalties you can be imposed on you for failing to pay back child support:

Seizure of tax refund

Denial of passport

Suspension of license

Wage garnishment

Jail time

Property seizure

In addition, your back child support money will still be due. However, there are ways to address your back child support issues and avoid the serious penalties.

The ideal move is to act and handle your responsibilities now. You can’t change the fact that you got behind but you can do something about it now. Do to the severity of back child support in some states; I suggest you contact a lawyer. Look for a lawyer that specializes in family law. Demonstrate to the courts you are willing to meet all your child support obligations. Maintain an open line of communication with you child’s mother. I know you have heard how a bitter mother can make your child support experience hell. Even if you are doing right by your child. Here are a couple options you may have in paying back child support.

If your child lived with you for a period of time, while you should have paid child support, you may be able to ask the court for equitable forgiveness. It is possible for the court to take equitable forgiveness into account and forgive a portion of your back child support debt.

If you have a record of your child support payments and feel you are paying the wrong amount, you can ask for a recalculation of your child support amount.

You can make a settlement with your ex. Organize negotiations through the courts to pay your ex a lump sum to settle the debt you owe. The court will need to approve such settlement.

Make an attempt to get your interest waived on what you owe in back child support. Submit a plan to pay off your back child support in specified time period. This could assist in getting your interest waiver approved.

Consider taking out a loan to pay for back child support. The interest rate on the loan could be lower than that of the back child support.

If you are not making that much money or short on work, see if you can spend more time with your child. Present this proposal as a way to free up time for your ex and it allow you to get more quality time with your child while you search for adequate employment.

If you are the one this post was written for, I wish you much luck in your attempt to make things right. I hope the information in this post is helpful to you. Thank you for taking the time to read it

20 Ways To Better Your Relationship With Your Significant Other (Part 1)

20 Ways To Better Your Relationship With Your Significant Other (Part 1)

  1. Thank her for just being herself.
  2. Place a love letter in her purse.
  3. Buy a gift card to her favorite spot.
  4. Make a coupon book for her to use for “special” favors.
  5. Take her for a getaway weekend without the kids.
  6. Pray together.
  7. Don’t ever give the silent treatment.
  8. Never yell at her.
  9. Don’t expect her to read your mind.
  10. Watch a chick-flick with her.
  11. Say I love you.
  12. Let her know you support her, not just with words but also with action.
  13. Don’t argue in front of people.
  14. Get and stay in shape. Workout together when possible.
  15. Be courteous and understanding of her wanting me time.
  16. Respect each other opinions.
  17. Make dinner for her.
  18. Schedule a date night.
  19. Don’t say, “I told you so.”

20. Focus on how to make things better, not who’s to blame.

Ways To Bond With The Family When You Have A Busy Schedule

Ways To Bond With The Family When You Have A Busy Schedule

Bills have to be paid and they don’t pay themselves. Kids are involved in more after schools activities than ever before. However, your family needs you, and truly wants and need to spend quality time with you. The following are 15 ways to connect and bond with your family when you are too busy or away.

  1. Put up funny and loving post-it notes in frequently visited areas of the house for your family members to find and enjoy.
  1. Allow your teenager to put together a mixtape or playlist of music he/she listens to. You guys can discuss the music after you listen to it.
  1. Schedule at least one-day trip a month to spend with the family, like a mini-vacation. Schedule it, post it and stick to it.
  1. Text household members daily to maintain a connection.

5. Eat as many meals together as possible. I know this can be difficult. Breakfast may be the best bet.

  1. Celebrate accomplishments as a family such as good grades, promotion at work, losing a pound or any small victory.
  1. Volunteering as a family unit is a great way to strengthen the family bond and instill positive values in your children.
  1. Start a 1000 piece puzzle. Family members work on it when they have a chance. Although, not done together, when it is complete it was a team effort.

9. Create a family Instagram or Facebook Group. This way you can check out what’s going in each other lives.

  1. Bake a cake a week until each member of the family as baked one. Each week the family rates the cake of the week and at the end of the month, pick who had the best tasting cake.
  1. Pick a movie scene for the family to re-enact. Each member is responsible for parts of the production and performance of the scene. On a scheduled date, record that scene performance.
  1. Skype when you are out of town. Simple enough, right.
  1. Play an online video against your children from everywhere you are in the world.
  1. Read a book or magazine article and have a discussion about it the next time the family is together.
  1. Write letters to each other and put it in the mail.

I Am The Atlanta Falcons

I Am The Atlanta Falcons

Now, even if you are not a Falcons fan, please don’t let that stop you from reading this blog post. The Atlanta Falcons ended the season 6-10 after a 4-14 season in 2013. Going into this 2014 season there were four main objectives; establish a running game, pass rush defense, beef up the offensive line and stop the run. Well, if you kept up with the Dirty Birds this season you know the outcome. The O Line suffered several injuries. I can honestly say that they indeed tried their best to improve the O Line. However, that defense! Let’s put it this way, worst in the league in nearly all-critical defensive stats. In the offseason it looked promising in the beginning, then their efforts just stopped. As a fan, I just trusted their decisions and readied myself for the season. That little effort to the defense earned us the worst defense in the league.

I love the Falcons, despite the two bad seasons, it’s sad to see that they fired Coach Mike Smith. I even at times said fire the coach, out of anger and frustration. However, I knew that he was only working with what he had. The thinking was that we could plug some random pieces in the defense and continue to let our Top 10 Offense carry the team. Well, that wasn’t enough. This is where I Am The Atlanta Falcons. As you may know, I operate Daddy Everyday Inc., a nonprofit organization for empowering black fathers. I have written two books, Daddy Everyday, Rewriting The Black American Dad Story and Mommy Everyday, Finding Balance In Motherhood. I have also developed a website (daddyeveryday.org) and a mobile app available on Amazon and Google Play that gives great empowering tools and information to fathers. In addition, I have hosted a couple of events with several more coming in 2015. Despite all that, I have not had the success or growth I desire. The reason why is because I much like the Falcons, know what I needed to do to take myself to the next level and have not done that. My “defensive needs” are networking and collaborating. I’ve been trying to start a movement by creating and developing all the tools and information to empower fathers and change communities, without building the team needed to accomplish my goals. Good looks can only take you so far.

I hope that all make sense; I tend to ramble when I’m trying to make a point. You can’t accomplish your goals if you don’t acknowledge and address your shortcomings. Just like the firing of Coach Mike Smith, the Atlanta Falcons have started their process of making the necessary changes; I have done so as well. So, get ready for Daddy Everyday Inc. and Atlanta Falcons to make a lot of noise in 2015.